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Every day, for the past week, I’ve called into the San Diego radio station KGB101.5 to talk to my friend Clint August, the on-air radio host.

Due to all the changes in our society in the past couple of weeks because of coronavirus, many couples or roommates are spending a lot more time together than before. Since our stress levels may be higher right now, and the quality of our home life is particularly important in difficult times, I wanted to contribute with daily well-being tips to help people get along better and be better able to appreciate their close connections. This is a unique time to develop new skills in communication, appreciation, and connection.

These are from the first week of call-ins.

Dr. Jenn’s Daily Well-being Tips on KGB101.5 San Diego

For your social, mental, and emotional well-being during coronavirus physical and social distancing.

1. Daily appreciations. With a partner, roommates, or alone, share daily appreciations. Set an alarm to remind you, and at, say, 8pm every night, share at least one thing you appreciate about your day (e.g., positive news, your health, a meme or video that made you laugh, a friend who reached out, the blue sky, whatever big or little thing you appreciate), and also share one thing you appreciate about the other person. Give details about what you appreciate and WHY you appreciate it. This will help you look for the positive each day, and help you stay in a grateful mindset towards those around you.

2. Reach out to others…even if you’re struggling. Research has found that when we’re altruistic and care about the well-being of others, it makes us feel better too. Create a list of folks you want to check in on regarding their mental, physical, and emotional well-being. If you have a partner you’re home with, brainstorm on this together about who you can reach out to and do so with at least one new/different person each day.

3. Conversations to know each other in new ways. Every day have a 10-minute (or longer) in-depth conversation you’ve never had before, to get to know each other even better and connect more deeply. I have a few suggested topics or questions:

· Favorite vacation as a kid and why.

· How they learned about sex education.

· What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever googled?

· Favorite book as a kid and why.

· If someone gave you $1000 and you had to spend it RIGHT now, what would you buy?

· Outline what a perfect day would look like to you.

4. Schedule “water cooler” breaks. If you are home all day with others or all-day on the weekends, schedule breaks during the day. For example, at 10:30am and 2:30pm, meet at a specific spot that you designate the water cooler for 10 to 15 minutes! Greet your partner (or roommate, etc) with friendly enthusiasm, and share a bit about your day. This is about creating a friendly ritual AND to make sure that you’re taking a movement break if you’ve been sitting for a long time.

5. Do at least ONE thing that is healthy for YOU every day. Prioritize time for you because it’s good for you, PLUS, you can be kinder to and better take care of others, if you’re feeling like you’ve taken time for your self-nurturing. Whether this is exercising, reading, watching something YOU want to watch, meditating, playing a video game… it’s not selfish to negotiate with your partner about your needs, and it’s really important to keep in mind that BOTH of you need time for self-nurturing.

Hang in there, folks. Despite the changes and disappointments and challenges, for many of you, this is a great time to cultivate new personal and relationship growth skills for your health, and the health of your relationships.

~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, San Diego Keynote Speaker, Intimacy Coach, & Sexologist