Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, sociologist and sexologist, writes her sex advice and gender commentary blog. The sex blog includes relationship advice, free sex education videos, sex tips, sex-positive mindfulness, and podcast interviews.
As a society, we are talking more openly about sex and sexuality, and there is increasing tolerance for sexual differences. However, the increasing public dialogue around sexual topics can lead both women and men to believe they are not keeping up...
Read MoreSex, Drugs, and Rock 'n Roll? Sign me up! That was the theme of the 5th annual TEDxPhoenixville event on September 27, 2014. I brought a heavier slant to the theme as a speaker about female sexual disempowerment, shame, and personal responsibility, and concluded by giving the audience a voice to take a stand for something different. It was really cool to have Kelly Stoetzel, the Content Director for TED, as our event emcee. The Colonial Theater (site of The Blob movie) did a wonderful job organizing the event (with the help of over 50 volunteers). And we had the last-minute bonus of a performance by a real rock 'n roller - Eric Bazilian of The Hooters! It was such a fun, powerful, community-minded day, I wanted to share some of the photos with you here :)
~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, San Diego Sexologist, Sociologist, Sexuality Speaker
With 69% of Americans overweight, and over a third of those obese, it's interesting that we don't know that much about how this impacts intimacy, sex, and relationships. There's been some fascinating recent research on this topic (including a new book called XL Love), and I discuss this on San Diego Living this morning with Marc Bailey. In general I think it's important to take a balanced approach with a topic like this - don't shame yourself and others because that causes a negative spiral of self-hate. But also be mindful of honoring and respecting your body through conscious eating choices and regular exercise. These are all important aspects of a healthy sex life!
Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, San Diego Sexologist, Sexuality Speaker, & Sociologist
With Comic Con in full swing in downtown San Diego right now, I’m having flashbacks to Wonder Woman from my childhood. And since I’m in the sex field, not surprisingly this progressed to me reflecting on Wonder Woman as a sexual archetype. An archetype is a constellation of personality traits that form a recognizable character, such as the Mother, the Warrior, or the Teacher. If someone asked you to enact one of these roles, you’d have a good idea of what to do because they make sense to us.
I expand on this concept of archetypes to include sexual archetypes who can help us grow in our sexual identities. Do you like who you are in the bedroom? Do you express yourself authentically and fully in sexually encounters? Do you bring the best of you to sex? If not, a sexual archetype can be a tool for growth.
Due to the stigmas and discomfort we have around full sexual expression in the United States, sexual expression can often be stifled. If you have a fear of sexual rejection or fear of sexual judgment for being authentically sexually you (who grows up in this society and doesn’t?!), it can feel terrifying to try something different.
One way to break through your sexual blocks is to choose a sexual archetype with whom you identify. While we have archetype understandings of the Seductress or the Whore or the Goddess, I like to extend this to our cultural icons. What Hollywood star, movie or television character, or book persona exudes a sexual energy you’d like to embody? This is beyond role-playing because you are pulling out parts of yourself and developing comfort with them, with the intention of long-term integration.
It’s important to recognize the difference here between “performance” and “authentic” sexual expression. I’m not suggesting that you “perform porn star,” but that you tap into an energy of expression that resonates deeply with you, but has been blocked or never developed. An archetype allows a big shift in perspective that offers permission to access and express new depths of your sexual being. So who do you want to be? If you're interested in learning more about the origins of the Wonder Woman character, check out my video from awhile ago about Wonder Woman.
~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, San Diego, CA -- Sociologist, Sexologist, Sexuality Speaker
(Photo of Lynda Carter as Wonder Woman from: http://bestofbothworldsaz.com/2011/03/12/wonder-woman-lynda-carter-an-arizona-beauty-2/)
Do we (as a society) want to encourage girls and teens to be strong, confident, and intelligent? If you look at some of the clothing available, you'd think to the contrary. Gratefully a new company, Keira's Kollection, is doing something about that! http://www.keiraskollection.com
~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, San Diego, CA -- Sociologist, Sexuality Speaker, Sexologist
Should women fight the aging process and cling to youth, so that they can feel and be perceived as sexy and attractive? I was interviewed on Channel 6's San Diego Living this morning about an Allure Magazine research study that just came out about beauty, aging, gender, and sex. My first thought is to question the source, since Allure Magazine is a "woman's magazine," which are notorious for emphasizing ideal physical appearance and youth for women. They did hire a marketing research company, but I'd like to get my hands on the survey and see how some of the questions were phrased. Nonetheless, we discuss this on the morning show, and how shifting perspective is the only way women can get off the beauty hamster wheel.
~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, San Diego, CA -- Sociologist, Sexologist, Sexuality Speaker
Dr. Jenn is a sociologist and relationship & sexuality speaker who challenges our cultural beliefs around sex, sexual consent, gender roles, and health intimacy, with a mindfulness and compassionate approach. Her site includes a sex blog, free sex education videos, sexuality speaking information, and mindfulness resources.
