Summer Lovin' - Quick Guide to Summer Romance

Summer loving had me a blast,

Summer loving happened so fast,

I met a girl crazy for me,

Met a boy cute as can be...

What is it about summer time that seems to make us feel more romantic? San Diego Living (Ch. 6) brought me in to discuss this as we launch into summer time. Is it the warmer days? Longer daylight? Less clothing? Nostalgic feelings? All of the above! I also share some tips about harnassing the sensual feeling of summer to ignite your summer romance.

~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, San Diego Sexuality Speaker, Sexologist, & Sociologist

Online Dating - Tips for Women

San Diego SexologistHaving recently experienced online dating for the first time, I was happy to discuss some of the research and ideas about it on Channel 6 News this morning. I offer some suggestions for women who want to do things differently. View below!

~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus -- San Diego Sexologist, Sexuality Speaker, Sociologist

Safe First Date Tips - San Diego Living

I'm not a fear monger and don't like to put folks into fear mode. On the only hand, there are some simple smarts tips that are valuable to keep in mind on a first date, so that you stay safe and in control! I was interviewed on San Diego Living this week about safe first date tips and early red flags in dating.

~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, San Diego - Sexologist, Sociologist, Sexuality Speaker

Why It's Important to Hurt Your Partner...Sometimes

I’ve seen a trend with some men. They are very afraid to hurt their female partner. They explained that they learned as kids, often from their dads, that “You don’t hurt a woman. Ever.” Kids generally don’t have the brain capacity to develop nuanced understandings around such topics. Therefore, by adulthood, this statement becomes a black and white obligation for men around a very complex emotional situation.

How might this show up for an adult man in a relationship?

He always says yes but then doesn’t follow through. He keeps his opinions to himself but slowly builds resentments over time. He denies responsibility or blames his partner when she is hurt by something he’s done.

Why is this problematic?

This pattern of communication can create big relationship problems. It’s all based in fear: fear of confrontation, fear of feeling horrible for hurting the woman you love, or fear of seeing her cry. But it’s imperative to recognize the difference between “small hurts” and “big hurts.” Small hurts, handled responsibly, can avoid big hurts.

All 7 billion people on the planet have their own unique perspective on the world. This means when two of those people are in relationship, they will have disagreements. This is natural, normal, and healthy. People get disappointed, choose to compromise, and are sometimes hurt. This is all part of the negotiation required to merge two lives. When we choose how to negotiate the small hurts honestly and responsibly, we can live more from love than fear, and keep the big hurts from growing.

~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, San Diego, CA -- Sexuality Speaker, Sex Therapist, College Sexual Health Speaker, Sexologist

Flirtation for Empowerment? Mama Gena's School of Womanly Arts: Session #66

Dr. Jenn shares an example womantra from the book Mama Gena’s School of Womanly Arts. What ARE the womanly arts? Dr. Jenn gets her alter-egos involved with this discussion of flirtation with Spicy Suzy, the Den Sexspert, and Jane, the Den Clinical Researcher.

THE DEN RECOMMEND:
Mama Gena’s School of Womanly Arts
by Regena Thomashauer 

May I Have this Kiss? Politically Correct Sex: Session #56

Long before #MeToo and social media saturation, Dr. Jenn talks about “politically correct” sexual initiation. Do you ask permission? Does this taint a relationship by removing spontaneity? She shares perspectives from viewers, when they answer whether they like the question, “May I Have a Kiss?”

THE DEN RECOMMEND:

www.safesax.com

~Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, San Diego Sexologist, Sociologist, Public Speaker (and asker of consent before a first kiss!)